September 9, 2014

  • 爱,很简单

    爱,很简单 – which basically translates to ‘Love is Simple’.

    David Tao’s very first single back in 1997 was ‘爱,很简单’. And when I first discovered this song, it became my new anthem. It is something that I held true even till this day – 爱,很简单. Love is simple.

    And why shouldn’t it be? I have always believed in this. I don’t believe that you need drama to make a relationship work. I think love should be basic and simple and intangible. It’s something that you feel. It’s that feeling you get when he holds your hand, or strokes your hair, or just looks at you with so much emotion.

    Love is simple.

    No one said love is easy. But then again, it should never have to be too hard. Love should just come naturally. You should not have to move mountains just to have your feelings reciprocated.

    So thank you David Tao. Thank you for teaching me what love is all about. :)

September 2, 2014

  • Comparisons


    I think it’s about time I stopped focusing on what I don’t have, and start focusing on what I do have instead.

    Nothing is ever gonna make me as happy as I am right now. I have everything I could ever want in life. I don’t have a single reason to feel inadequate or sad. It’s time to snap out of it and stop craving sadness. Which I think is something I tend to do whenever things start getting good… I wait for the other shoe to drop.

    Fact is, I have achieved more than a lot of others my age. There are always gonna be better people out there, and I can envy all I want. But perhaps I could also be an object of envy.

    I’m not a particularly career-minded person, because I believe I have other priorities – like family. And that’s ok.

    I don’t have ring on my finger. But I have a boy who loves me more than anything, and who I love back. I have a family who’s more than supportive of my perfect relationship, and that is more than enough for me. I want a relationship where both sides never stop trying. And I never want to stop chasing him. I never want to stop telling him that I love him. I never want to stop gazing at him with nothing but admiration in my eyes. I never want to stop surprising him with notes and messages, or little presents and gifts. I never want to stop giving him the world.

    Because he deserves it. And that’s what counts.

August 28, 2014

  • The Chase


    “Don’t stop chasing.

    I think that one of the biggest reason why relationships do not work out in the long run is because at one point, one side (or both) stops trying. Before one claims another person as their significant other, they would do anything to make that person happy. They would chase, they would flirt, they would be charming. They would send daily morning and goodnight texts every time you wake up or go to sleep. They would write corny messages and pick up lines just to make sure that there is a smile upon your face. But once they claim you as theirs, all of those things eventually stop. The 5 page texts slowly turn into 1. The constant calls turn into not calling at all. And the lovely endearments turn into daily arguments. In order for a relationship to work, don’t ever stop chasing. Just because the person you want is now consider “yours”, it does not mean they deserve anything less than the time when you’re trying to win them over.”

August 27, 2014

  • Katrina, will I ever know your heart?


    David Tao – Katrina:

    Katrina I can’t stop looking in your eyes
    But my words don’t come out straight
    I don’t know what to say
    On monday I tell myself you gotta wait Dave,
    Don’t rush it, don’t anticipate, take it slowly
    It’s ok, It’s ok.

    And I just want a chance to know you to know the woman deep inside,
    And I don’t wanna look back on life to see this missed opportunity
    To get to know you
    Even at the risk of looking like a fool to you

    On Wednesday I casually walk on by to find that you’re not there,
    I act like I don’t care.
    But on Friday I catch a glimpse of you I tell myself don’t hesitate,
    You just walk up and say hello! Say hello!

    And I just want a chance to know you to know the woman deep inside,
    And I don’t wanna look back on life to see this missed opportunity
    To get to know you
    Even at the risk of looking like a fool to you

    I just want a chance to know you to know the love you have inside
    And I don’t wanna look back on life to see this missed opportunity
    Even at the risk of looking like a fool to you

    Katrina, will I ever know your heart?

August 26, 2014

  • Shake it off


    I find it so funny that the people who treat you like shit gets offended when you finally do the same to them.

    What happened this past weekend has completely caught me off guard.

    I never gave you a reason to hate me. You’re just creating your own little drama of pure insecurity. So before you judge me, make sure you’re perfect. I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.

    If I were really such a fucking bitch, I would make your live a living hell. But you know what? I’m not. So I’ll just sit back and watch you do it yourself.

    I’m so done with being upset and crying over things that I cannot control. At the end of the day, I don’t have any guilt weighing on top of me.

August 6, 2014

  • 当你


    如果有一天 梦想都实现
    你是否还会 记得今天
    如果有一天 我们都发觉
    我们是否还会 停留在这里

    当你的眼睛 瞇着笑
    当你喝可乐 当你吵
    我想对你好 你从来不知道
    想你 想你 也能成为嗜好
    当你说夜深 你睡不着
    我想对你说 却害怕都说错
    好喜欢你 知不知道

July 30, 2014

  • Tension


    So I’ve been reconnecting with some old songs I have on my iTunes recently. I came across super old songs from one of my most favourite bands ever – Tension. For some reason, this makes me very nostalgic and even emotional.

    I’ll admit that I no longer listen to Chinese music anymore. I can’t even tell you the names of some newer Chinese pop singers. I am no longer in touch with that industry anymore. But back then in my secondary school days when I was exposed to it, Tension and David Tao were no doubt my biggest influencers. Of course, David Tao will always be my number one, and I was introduced to Tension because they were Tao’s proteges.

    While listening to their music recently, I got to thinking about how much Tension and David Tao’s music has got me through such dark times back then – when I was pretty much lost and directionless. I remembered once writing David Tao a letter telling how much he has helped me and given me so much hope through his music. A lot of the things I hold true till this day was inspired by him.

    I was heartbroken when Tension disbanded many years ago. From what I know, they disbanded due to a dispute with their record company. Apparently, they were made to do covers of korean and japanese songs, and they did not want to. Understandable, considering how talented these guys are. They are all composers and original artistes. and I respect the fact that they did not want to be copies. They introduced me to acapella, and I have been a huge fan of acapella ever since.

    Tension is just so different from the other rubbish boybands out there. I mean, apart from the obvious fact – they don’t look like your typical boyband. Good looks are not their best appeal, but who cares? Especially when they make such beautiful music. And that’s what I love most about them.

    I can’t help but wonder where Tension is now and what the members are doing. I gotta admit that my ‘creepy-mode’ came on and I did a random Facebook search and found some of their personal accounts. From what I can see, most of them returned to America after they disbanded. Jimmy is still perusing his singing career, and I expected no less from the son of the great Sammo Hung. Andy seems to be some kind of music teacher in America. John and Brian’s profiles are private, so I couldn’t really see anything, but they seem to be back in America too. Brian’s profile pic had a girl in it. His girlfriend? Wife? I couldn’t find Raymond’s profile though, but I believe he’s the only one still in Taiwan.

    Ok, creepy much? And what’s really the point of this long and seemingly pointless entry?

    I just wanted to say that I miss Tension so much. Listening to their old music now brought legit tears to my eyes. In fact, I can’t help but feel a bit teary eyed typing this. I miss their music most of all. I wish they would have a reunion some day. Wishful thinking?

    The very first acapella song I was exposed to, and I have to say my top 5 most favourite songs of all time:

    My other favourite Tension acapella song:

July 15, 2014

  • Defying Gravity


    Together we’re unlimited
    Together we’ll be the greatest team
    There’s ever been, Glinda
    Dreams, the way we planned ‘em
    If we work in tandem
    There’s no fight we cannot win
    Just you and I
    Defying gravity
    With you and I
    Defying gravity
    They’ll never bring us down!

June 24, 2014

  • Fair weathered friends


    “True friendship is not about being there when it’s convenient. It’s about being there when it’s not.”

    Today I got rid of a fair-weathered ‘friend’. I can’t say I’m not slightly upset over it, but frankly, it does feel more like a giant weight lifted off my shoulders. To be honest, it was a ‘friendship’ that I had long gotten over already anyways. It was not like we had anything more to contribute to each other.

    I generally don’t ask for much when it comes to friendships. I don’t expect constant attention or presence, because I know that realistically, that is not something I can promise myself. But I guess my litmus test for a worthwhile friendship is ‘effort’. To me, the measure of how much effort someone puts into a friendship is an indication of exactly how much value that friendship holds. And I guess you can say that ‘effort’ is pretty generic and subjective, but really, I’m not asking for much.

    There is nothing I hate more than chasing people around asking for meetups and dates and to constantly be either shut down, or stood up at the last minute. And I absolutely hate false promises of ‘oh yea! let’s meet up soon please!’, and then you don’t hear from them forever. I know I do that too sometimes, but never to the people who actually matter. We’re all adults now. I’m sure we have the ability and time management skills to hold ourselves true to dates and appointments.

    And fyi, ‘busy’ is the biggest bullshit ever. We live in a world where technology and companies exclusively try to make our lives easier by helping us. And yet we shuffle around everyday telling everyone we can that we are just way too ‘busy’. Too busy to meet up with friends for one meal? Sorry, but I was not born yesterday. You either make the effort, or you don’t.

    I have nothing against having to reschedule meetups etc because our schedules don’t fit. That shit happens and I’m not an unreasonable prick. But at least MAKE the effort to reschedule. If you’re the one spending your whole day working and possibly ridding the world of poverty and hunger, then maybe you should take the initiative to make something work with others. It beats someone else constantly coming up with plans, and you saying you can’t make it for everything.

    For the sake of argument, let’s say you ARE ‘too busy’. Let’s just humour ourselves and pretend like we really do not have enough hours in the day for work… but you see, that’s where effort comes in. You make effort and time for the people you care about. You don’t take friendships for granted. You can’t expect to have something good without putting in any work. That whole ‘true friendship is about not needing to see each other and yet feeling just like old times’ thing is a whole load of romantic bullcrap. I’m not saying it’s not entirely true, but I believe that that is lazy person speak.

    And last but not least, when confronted with the issue at hand, don’t self-victimize and act like as if it’s everyone else’s fault for not understanding your busy scheduling fighting world crime perhaps. Get over yourself and do some self-reflection for God’s sake. The world does not revolve around you!

    Friendships are like skills. If you don’t practice, you lose them eventually.

    Now that all that has been said and done, I feel good. There is a tinge of sadness buried somewhere inside, but not enough to stop me from feeling relieved. I have decided that from now on, I am going to focus on myself and my life. Personally, I take everything very seriously and I let most things affect. But you know what? No more. I am going to focus on things that make me happy and things that help me to grow as a person. No more drama to hold me back. I’m twenty-fucking-six years old. I don’t need high school drama in my life any more.

    My life is going to keep getting better, and I am eventually going to have more and more responsibilities. I am going to sleep well at night knowing that at least I have rid myself of toxins and bad energy. I will just focus on making my life better and better. And on top of that, I will focus my energy on the people in my life who CAN make the effort and who bother to keep me in it.

June 17, 2014

  • Passive agression


    I have an irrational need to be liked. Which is strange, because I developed this only in my adult years. While most has learned to give the world a finger and ignore it’s opinions, I’m starting to adsorb more and more the opinions others have of me. It’s not healthy, really. Because soon it turns into an obsession.

    It’s something I would like to overcome though. For my own sanity. I need to learn how to stop trying to please others. I have tried doing it once or twice before, and then what follows is a tsunami of overwhelming guilt and feelings. I can’t help but let others get to me. And it’s often the cause of my sleepless nights.

    When will I learn not to care?

    It’s harder when it’s from the people around me. Constant fear of offending them and making them mad. It shouldn’t bother me, but it does. And I hate it.

    Fact is, I have extremely thin skin. It doesn’t take much to break me down and flood me with insecurities. It’s a curse.

    Worst part is how I deal with it. My natural react to anything is to cry – I cry when I’m happy, I cry when I’m sad, I cry when I get slightly annoyed, and -horrors of horrors- I cry when I’m mad. That means more often than not, I have the inability to express myself coherently, what with all the sobbing and whatnots. It’s not that I don’t realise what I should be doing instead, but who’s going to stop me?